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Would you change it?

Title:  Would You Change it?
Author: Mulderache
Spoilers: Everything Xfiles
Disclaimer: They belong to Chris Carter and Fox.

Hotel

She awakened from a bad dream. A dream where soldiers 
were chasing them and where it just would not stop. 
The never ending running and hiding. She looked over 
to see Mulder but he was missing. It was difficult to 
tell if the sun was up or if it was still dark outside 
because of the thick curtains that covered the windows. 
She slid out of bed and pulled her robe around her and 
walked over to the window. She could see him standing 
outside in bare feet, blue jeans and his t-shirt. He 
had taken to looking at the stars a lot in the past 
few days. She wondered what was on his mind. They had 
been through so much together but he had endured more 
physically. He had refused any medical attention for 
his many bruises and she worried about the mental stress 
he had to endure while being captive in the military 
prison had effected him.

She quickly dressed and pulled on her jacket. She needed 
to go and retrieve him. She opened the door and walked 
out and stood by his side. She remained quiet for a few 
minutes and then she took his arm and gently nudged him 
to come back into the warm room. He nodded and followed 
her back inside,quietly he walked back to the bed and 
sat down. He looked up at her and gave her a small grin. 
"Guess that was not a smart thing to do especially with 
the temperatures dropping to low thirties but I had a 
dream."

She pulled off her jacket and placed on the hanger and 
hung it in the rack. She then walked over and sat down 
beside him. "Mulder,do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head and avoided any eye contact. After a 
few moments he spoke, his voice was low and serious. 
"Let's play a game Scully."

The words took her by surprise and with some trepidation 
she asked,"Game. What game Mulder?"

The name of the game is 'Would you change it?" and 
the only rule is that you have to be honest.

She pondered where he was going with this for a few 
moments then answered, "Yes Mulder I'll play." With 
that answer she stood and pulled the old worn chair 
that sat in the corner of the room in front of Mulder 
and she sat down. "Ready to play Mulder.", she spoke out 
loud to her partner but inside she was concerned at where
he was going with this game.

He nodded and sat back more on the bed, pulling his dirt 
covered feet up and dusting them off with his hand and 
then pulling them up underneath him. He thought for a 
second and then asked his first question, "Would you 
change our first meeting in the office?"

She smiled, "No spooky Mulder. I would not change that day."

He nodded but no smile, "Okay, but would you change the 
the moment that you realized that there was a possiblity 
that extraterestial life could exist?"

"I have always accepted the truth Mulder. It may have been 
a difficult thing to accept but I would not have changed the 
fact that it was real or the truth." She sat more upright 
in the chair and wondered what he would ask next.

He seemed to be dealing more inwardly with his next question 
and after a few minutes he asked, " Would you still ask me 
to be the father of your child Scully knowing what you know 
now?" he paused a few seconds then continued, "Would you 
change it?" He looked up at her and now his hazel eyes were 
filled with tears.

This question touched her heart. Did he not realized how 
much she loved him? She stood and walked the the short 
distance to the bed and took him into her arms. " Are you 
asking me if I would change the way God meant for it to be? 
Are you asking me if I would give up our miracle? 
Are you asking if I would 
change the most important decision of our lives?"

"But Scully didn't you have to give him up because of me? 
I gave you a child only for him to be taken away like 
everything else in our lives. I have failed you and our 
son Scully. I stay up at night wondering if I could change 
things what would I change and the only thing I would not 
change is you or our son but that is so selfish. The two 
most dearest people in my life are the ones suffering the 
most for this quest that I started on so long ago. Scully, 
it is just not fair for either of you.",the emotion in his 
voice matched the pain etched on his face.

She pulled back so that he could see her face clearly, 
"No Mulder I would not change that moment I asked you to 
be the father of my child. I would not have changed the 
moment I came into your bed and made love to you that 
night. I would not change one moment of my life since 
I met you, even the most difficult moments have made us 
what we are today and that is not a bad thing Mulder. Yes, 
I wish we could have William here with us but we have a 
mission and that is to ensure that our son has a long life 
here on this Earth Mulder. Someone has to make the sacrifice 
and we were chosen Mulder, either by fate or by God, we were 
chosen to make it right. We have work to do and the greatest 
thing we can give our son is a long life."

He smiled at Scully and nodded, " You're right Scully. 
William will be fine. We need to ensure that he will 
always be fine." He took her into his arms and held on tight
and they remained that 
way for a long time.

"Mulder?" she called his name softly.

"Yes Scully." he replied, rather worried that she 
might be having second thoughts.

" I would change that time that you took me into the woods. 
You know the mothmen."

"Sorry about that Scully." 

" Oh and that time that you chased that vampire and drove 
the stake through his heart. That too"

" But then you wouldn't have met the cute sheriff."

"Who by the way turned out to be a vampire too"

" Sorry Scully."

" And what about that time I you took me to that little 
town where the citizens were cannibals. They almost 
beheaded me Mulder. Definitely I would change that too."

"Okay Scully. I get the point." He reached up and turned 
off the light." Good night Scully."

" Wait Mulder, I'm on a roll."

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